Over 30 Hockey League

Thank you for participating in their ceremony…, and stay tuned as we have another iconic player on deck this month.

Technical Difficulties

We want to offer our apologies to the players as the technical difficulties with the timeclocks continue to pile up and disrupt the weekly games.

While many players want to blame Phil Russo and other timekeepers (and rightfully so) for the clock issues…, we can assure you it’s not them, it’s the equipment.

There are (3) timeclocks, including one that looks like the Bruins used it back in the day when it was an ice hockey rink upstairs.

With these antiquated timeclocks it’s like a George Costanza routine… “It’s not you, it’s me” but we are here to assure you “it’s not them, it’s the clock”… so let’s try having some patience with the hard working staff of the Over-30 League.

Next person that bitches about the timeclock will be suspended and forced to be a timekeeper for a week…, and see how many seconds (or in Phil’s case - minutes) you can shave off (or add to) a 30-minute game.   

Three Blind Mice

There was another first in the Over-30 League… All (3) Referees showed up to the 4:30 game dressed in their zebra suits and then debated between themselves on who would stay on the floor and miss calls…, and who was going to time keep and screw up the clock.

Phil Russo drew the short straw and well… you know how the rest of that story goes.

Spark ‘em up!!

Ok Boy’s… you know what time it is?  Time to… “Spark ‘em up!!”

“Spark ‘em up!!”…, is the new tradition in the Over-30 League that was borrowed from Mercury Morris and the 1972 Miami Dolphins to celebrate their perfect NFL season. 

Now the former Roadrunners can celebrate (once again) their Spring 2023 “Perfect Season” with a “Sparkplug” shot courtesy of Gary Goodwin.

Who would have ever thought that (back in the Revere days) Gary “Stonehands” aka “The Curse” would one day be only (1) of 12-players to ever play in the league and be part of the only perfect season (to date).

This week is also a little special… Toss one back for Mercury Morris who passed away last week at age 77.  He’s the guy that gave you the right to celebrate perfection!   ~ RIP Mercury

First Win!

Azores Express Captain Dave Costa was committed to not being the first 0-4 team of the season…, and thanks to fill-in goalie Mike Viera (he wasn’t).  Mike only faced 25-shots compared to the peppering that M*A*S*H goaltender Dave Giusti took at the other end of the rink. 

Hey Mr. Costa, don’t get too comfortable with your prized D1 Champion in net…, rumor has it Jake Deehan will be back next week to “derail” the winning train, (if) you can beat Hammertime this week to make it an official “winning streak” before he returns.

Calvary Coming

When two 0-3 teams meet… only one can come out 0-4 and unfortunately for M*A*S*H it was them, as they were sent to the infirmary to lick their wounds.

Captain Jamie Kehoe needs to help figure out his offensive weapons…, as the ones he currently has, are shooting blanks with only 7-goals on the season.  We heard through the waiver wire reports, that help from another branch of the military is coming over the horizon…, and that a member from the Calvary is on his way.

Free Minutes

Oh, and before we forget… the timekeeper gave M*A*S*H a minimum of two free minutes to try and score some extra goals in your quest for your first win. 

The only problem was you spent the extra 2-minutes defending and having Dave Giusti make additional saves.  The poor guy was shell shocked from the 35-shots he faced (and he only gave up two goals)… which is just 1-goal more that his offense scored.

Blue Ribbons

Here we go again…, Blue Ribbons for everyone.  Can someone explain to me how a 3-1 loss produces a #3 Star and a Goalie Award for M*A*S*H?

Did Tommy Gallagher get “Star votes” for showing up late, or the 0-goals and 0-assists? 

Ron “The Flyin’ Hawaiian” Aquino had better numbers…, and Gino Tammaro had a goal (ENG) and an assist (same as Pedro Fontes) 1-goal & 1-assist, and he was the #1 Star.

We know that the winning goalie Mike Viera is not eligible for weekly awards…, and Dave Giusti had the lowest goals against for Week #4 as once again he was the “Best of the Worst” for the goalies last week, and through no fault of his own was on his way to his 4^th straight loss.

Stay strong Dave… Help is on the way!

Don’t Shoot!

Thankfully Donny Maccini is not a Police Officer, Military Personal, or even a Starter for a Race…, because all of those require shooting…, and based on what we witnessed last week, Donny is afraid to shoot.

This week the players on Hammertime are getting their new team shorts…, and if Donny continues to give up one-timers and shots, Captain Jim Barber is going to ask the leagues official apparel supplier if they can put a #97 on the back of Donny’s new one-off team jersey.

One Question?

We just have one question regarding the Hammertime vs Barney & Friends.

“Who the FU@# is Kyle McCabe?”

Last week we watched a newbie Kyle McCabe bury two goals on arguably one of the leagues top 2-goalies (some say #1) in Dale McIssac.  Where not sure if Dale was welcoming Kyle to the league with a couple of gifts from Hammertime…, but Dale was sure not to let the Rookie score his 1^st, 2^nd and 3^rd goal of his inaugural season on him.  Dale’s not handing out hat tricks to Rookies this season.

So, welcome to the Over-30 League Kyle (whoever you are)…, you scored a couple of goals on one of the best… it only gets easier from here.

Taste it!

Sorry Jamie Kehoe…, you only get a taste of victory, and not an actual “W” in your win column.  With no John Carey and Elder Lopes for Hammertime…, Jamie was tapped to fill in as the #1 defenseman. 

After the win we asked Jamie how it felt to win a game this season and what he thought was the difference.   Jamie said it was nice to see an offense score more than 3-goals…, and thinks if his team can score (4) or more goals in a game…,  then they have a real chance of posting some wins in the second third of the season.

More Questions???

Did anyone see Hall of Fame bound Doug Sedille when he was in the offensive zone all by himself?

Did anyone see what happened?  But, the real question is WTF was that?

Doug was all alone in the offensive zone, just him and the ball looking at a wide-open lane to Scotty Rosato for a breakaway…, but Dougie had a malfunction.  He either forgot how good he used to be, or how much slower he became… as he just took 4-steps and fired one on Scotty for an easy save.  Come on Doug, we wanted to see what a first ballot Hall of Famer had on a breakaway.

Fishbowl Trick

We have the first “Fishbowl Trick” of the season as Patrick Spencer played one of his best games wearing a helmet.  Patrick has taken a lot of heat for the decline in his game since strapping on a white bucket and windshield…, but last week he proved his critics wrong as he scored a hat trick which included the GWG late in the 3^rd.

We also noticed that Patrick travels with his own personal cheering section complete with bleachers and cheerleaders.   Congrats Pat…, but now were on to Week #5.

Roofers Wanted

Looks like Gary Goodwin has his first new employee for “Stonehands Roofing”, as Gary put out an ad on Craigslist for “Roofers Wanted”.

His first interview was Eddie “The Chin” Chin who applied for the position.  Gary asked if he had any experience in “Roofing” and Eddie said yes… “Last week I was doing a job in Saugus when I went in on a semi-breakaway and “Roofed” one on Sean Roach for our first goal.”

He continued by saying; “I don’t remember much after that because the guys in “Hecklers Row” went nuts.”

Gary said; “Welcome to the team Eddie, we work every Saturday between 4:30 & 7:30 and like an Over-30 Referee… I don’t pay for overtime”

Handy Manny

Look out Over-30 League…, there’s a new re-energized player and he’s writing children’s books detailing his newfound success in the league.

Manny Nunes is making a run at the “Portuguese Power” title after scoring a hat trick last week.

Manny writes all about it, in his new book;