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Player Spotlights

Tony Medeiros

John Colucciello

Ray Dow

John Kelleher

Jim Barber

Tony Mastrocola

Dave Curcio

Scott Young

Mike Hollingsworth

Tono Bono

Nick Romano

Jim Clarke

Jeff Deharo

Thomas Bardascino

Mike Naczas (Naz)

Mike Luise

Doug Sedille

Dan Broderick

Pat Pirone

Steve Oppedisano

Matt Iannello

Bill Mack

Joe Shannon

Ed Dullea

Mark Stickney

The Curse's

Ed Nigro

Ray Nickerson

P.U.T.A Forum Newsletter

Article 339 March 25, 2017

Game results and Player(s) of the Week


Week of March 18 (Game 1) – To quote the movie Rocky 4 featuring Ivan Drago, “You see. You see.  He’s not a machine, he’s a man” that same sentiment was echoing in the ears of the entire Sour Grapes team as they showed the rest of the Over-30 league that Yellow Submarine is not invincible, shutting down the juggernaut by the score of 3 – 0.  In the process, this also put an end to that three game winning streak of Yellow Submarine.

The first period was played very sluggishly as both teams tried to find not only their running legs but also their offensive games.  The result was a vanilla-like effort by both teams that produced little scoring chances and no goals.

In the second period, only two minutes in, Sour Grapes broke through on Big Mike Surette’s unassisted long shot that surprised the goalie giving his team the lead.  Finally, Big Mike broke through on the score sheet getting credit for his first point this season.  Now he only needs four more points to surpass his total “delay of game” penalty totals for this season.  Four minutes later, while his team was playing short-handed saw George Medeiros scoring to continue his hot scoring streak (3 goals in his last two games) as he was set up by the hustle of Rick Cassano.

Halfway through the third period, Sergio Costa gave his Sour Grapes team some much needed breathing room, as he was set up by Rick and Dan Broderick.  All that was left in doubt was whether fill in goalie Sandra Glista would keep her shutout, which she did, stopping all twenty-three shots she faced.

The win by Sour Grapes increased their lead over Shark Attack to five points for that final playoff spot and clearly shifted the pressure over to Shark Attack to respond accordingly.    

Week of March 18 (Game 2) – Most Over-30 games that result in wins place an emphasis on speed and a strong running game; however, the Pylons went against the popular thinking and employed the Turtle offense, using a slow and steady attack that resulted in a come from behind 4 – 3 win over Shark Attack in overtime.  

Shark Attack came out running and playing smothering team defense that limited the Pylons scoring chances.  Four minutes in on the fore check, Ron Aquino scored his first-ever Over-30 league goal when he jumped on a turnover by the defense of the Pylons to give Shark Attack the early lead.  Less than a minute later saw Mauro Colucciello convert off some tic-tac-toe passing between Mark Stickney and Jim Barber, increasing the lead by two.  This was the best period Shark Attack had played this season and it paid off.

Throughout the second period, Shark Attack continued to smother the scoring chances of the Pylons until Joe “Turtle” Mancinelli took advantage of a defensive breakdown that allowed him to walk out front untouched to score for the Pylons, set up by Anthony Lauletta and John Kelleher. 

The third period featured a few momentum swings by both teams.  Less than a minute in, Anthony took a feed from Joe and John out front to score and tie this game up.  Halfway through the period, Shark Attack found itself on the power play and took advantage when Niko Vramis converted off some perimeter passing by Mauro and Bill Abcunas.  The next four minutes were played at a fast pace up and down when another defensive zone coverage breakdown by Shark Attack resulted in Joe scoring again batting the ball into the short side with some crafty hand-eye skills with just over a minute to play, set up by Jamie Kehoe and Shawn Miville.

In overtime, both teams had scoring chances yet the Turtle completed his hat trick when he beat the goalie from thirty feet out on the left wing to seal the win for his team.

Trash Can Talk

Practice Make Perfect

Sandra Glista has been at an undisclosed location crafting her skills while she continues her impressive Over-30 "fill-in" goalie stats.  We obtained super-secret (spy gate) video footage capturing the secret to Sandra’s shutouts.


Many players have been asking why isn't Sandra "filling-in" for their team... Why do they have to use "BYE Week" Over-30 "fill-in" goalie with the GAA of 4.0+???

#FillinGoaliesMatter

Sandra and Jay Glista... Allow me to express my apologies on behalf of the league for yet another wrong presentation award mix-up.

Apparently Sandra's stellar "SHUTOUT" performance in net against the "First" place team was not good enough to win the “Dunkin Donuts Player of the week Award”.

That award went to Joe "Turtle" Mancinelli as he beat up the “Last” place team and goalie in an effort to make up for the weeks prior performance on defense.

Shame on you; Award Voters and Presenter… for getting it wrong (again) last week.

Scared to loose

Looks like the two Leading Goalie Award candidates were afraid to play each other last week.  

Jeff Deharo and his 2.57 GAA hired Sandra Glista do his bidding last week against what was supposed to be Tim Hickey and his 2.8 GAA... But Yellow Submarine drew the "short" straw (literally) and had Scotty Rosato filling in for Timmy.

Both Jeff and Tim were afraid to give up ground against each other in a tight race.

We'll have to wait and see if they'll actually play each other for the final game of the season in Week 15... Or will one or both of them call in sick to try and win the Leading Goalie Award from their couch (Again)?

Late Excuses

Looks like Jay Carrien had a legitimate reasons for being late all the time.   Jay was attending Lamaze Class to prep for the birth of his Daughter Kelsey.   Congrats on the new baby... Now here’s a list of new excuses for being late;

  • I was on diaper duty
  • Overslept from exhaustion
  • I had to finish my Gerber peas before I could leave the table
  • I was meticulously taping my stick like Billy

What the ever the reason Jay's late.., congrats from all of us at the Over-30 League.


Ring, Ring... Ring, Ring

Hey Bob Synder answer the damn phone...

It's Eminem calling he wants his "Du Rag" back.  


In Game Adjustments

As a Captain you always need to make in game adjustments.  Sometimes it's a motivational tool and sometimes it's strategically done for a situation.., last week we saw both from Yellow Submarine and Shark Attack captains make those "in game adjustments".  

First up;  Yellow Submarine Captain Matty Iannello made an "in game adjustment" by demoting Umberto "Papa Smurf" Biancardi from the first line right winger with "The Great One" (himself) and Ray Nickerson.  Playing right wing with two-thirds of the “Holy Trinity” is a dream gig where you'll record plenty of points (if) you just do your job.

After several "anonymous" complaints from Ray Nickerson on being "FCUKED" out of potential points from "Papa" missing a wide open empty nette... Matty went down to the farm team line and brought up Brian Kehoe to replace the aging smurf.  

The result was they hit more posts... But, they failed to score any goals.  So was it really "Papa's" fault for Yellow Submarine getting blanked by Sour Grapes??

Then Shark Attack Captain Jim Barber recognizing desperation and needing to put together some wins... Used a big monkey paw to hook Ron Aquino from a power play opportunity and replaced him with Mauro Coluccielo which quickly paid dividends in the form of a PPG for cousin Niko Vramis. 

It's just a shame that Shark Attack couldn't hang on for the win and ending up losing in OT... and as Mike Luise said... "That's just how our season(s) have been going"

"Short"-Shorthanded Goal

Last week George Medeiros and Rick Cassano's tenacity paid off while teammate Angelo "Kato" Deluca spent time in the penalty box.

Making up for Angelo’s penalty… George and Rick went on a full court press while shorthanded and it paid off as George lit the lamp from Rick’s perfect pass. 

Which leads us to ponder this... since George is only 48" tall and just tall enough to ride all the rides at Disney.., would you consider George's goal a "Short-Shorthanded Goal"?   On the scoring sheets it's recorded as an "SHG" but could it also be "SSHG" or "S2HG"???

Fund Raising

Hey Steve "Cheech" Iacoviello & Walter "Chong" Maslak... Better known as "Cheech & Chong”, it's time to stop sampling the stash and start selling for profit... Then taking those profits and paying your hockey dues.

Here's another idea to raise money for "rent" and "hockey dues"....


The Curse of "Stumbles"

Call it “Karma”... Call it a “Godsmack”... Or call it “Vodoo payback”, but the curse of Steve "Stumbles" Oppedisano strikes again and last week it took down a big named player.

Back pedaling in his own zone and not a player within 15-feet of him... (Former) League Director Bill Abcunas hit the dek for no apparent reason.

Initial concerns were that he had some kind of medical incident because he just dropped like a prom dress on prom night (right to the floor)... But after getting up and brushing off the "stench of embarrassment" he quickly jumped back into the play.  

Italian First Aid kit   

John Colucciello is teaming up with Anheuser-Busch to launch a new a new line of beers for the King of Beers

After taking a Mike Luise shot to the face... Cooch was seen pacing all over the dek in agony.  He was pacing so much that we thought he was trying out a new face off routine.  Turns out John was struck in the eye and in extreme pain.

While on the bench one of his “Italian Doctors” told him to put “ice” on it.   Not having real ice on the bench it was suggested Cooch apply a cold can of "Bud Ice" to the cheek and eye area.   Apparently the Italians figured "Hey it's got ice the name"

That advice from an unlicensed Italian Doctor came the idea for Budweiser's new product line "Bud Eyce" 

Their marketing slogan... Apply a cold can of "Bud Eyce" to numb the pain, and then drink the contents of the can to forget about the pain.

Another Bad Call

Speaking of “icing”... Shame on you referee Joe Shannon.  Not only is your former team trying to stay out of the basement and qualify for the playoffs… But you screwed them last week with a bad icing call.

Shark Attack Captain Jim Barber busted his ass to prevent an icing and get a face-off in the offense of zone. 

Pylons Goaltender Jake "from State Farm" Deehan came way out of his crease to tie up a ball that would have been icing (had) Jake not put his glove down and covered it up BEFORE the icing line.

It would've been a definite non-contested icing call if Jake stayed in his crease and let the ball pass the line.  But, Jake got nervous when he saw Jim bearing down and closing quickly, so he came out of his crease and covered the ball BEFORE the icing line.

Jim, thinking he just secured an offensive faceoff for his team quickly learned that Joe had called an icing... Whaaaattttt???

Joe's deductive reasoning and his “demonstration” to head referee and future Bricklayer Jon Picard was that Jake's glove was on the line.  It sure was Joe... But the ball never crossed the line he trapped it before the line.., but you couldn't have seen that from 25 feet away when you made the erroneous call.

He went to Jared

First he went to Jared's (for the ring)... Then he went to Sleepy's (for the mattress)... Then he went to the Florist (for the flowers)... Then he went to Bootyville for a "Brown Chicken, Bown Cow"


Congratulations to Dominic DeFrancisco... 2017 is quickly becoming your year.   You started the year by receiving your 3rd straight championship jacket.   Your team this year is almost locked in for another playoff run to defend your title and your only 4-points off the League Leader.

As is that wasn't enough... Now you went and got engaged to Christine Leite (sister) of the Over-30 League "Codfather" John Leite.

We at the Over-30 League would like to congratulate you on your engagement and almost spelling "Will U Marry Me” correctly… you must have under estimated the amount of rose pedals you needed because you left out the “Y” and “O” in “You”.

As a veteran of the Over-30 league and a veteran of relationships.., Allow me offer you this; sure everything is "Rosie" now with the rose-pedal messages... But in just a few short years (after) you tie the knot... The only message Christine is going to see is about twenty dirty socks on the floor that spells out "WASH ME".

I know I speak for all of us when I say congratulations to you and Christine.