Get Well Soon
Big shout out and get well soon to George Hodgdon who is once again battling another mysterious health problem.
Apparently his nerves are misfiring to his legs.., per a previous league email update that stated;
"What they did tell him (George) was something was going on with the signal generated from his brain not traveling to his feet. Something was affecting that signal to not be received by the nerves in his feet. Hence, his inability to move his feet"
This would make sense because according to Nick Romano.., George’s nerve signals that were supposed to go to his feet.., were actually redirected to his mouth and whistle.., as one of last games George refereed he tossed "Massachusettes #1 Sander" out of the game after (3) slashing penalties.
Well George; like all diseases.., no one fights it alone and in your case there's a few players in the league that are suffering from the same thing;
Umberto "Papa Smurf" Biancardi, Joe "Turtle" Mancinelli, Mike "Windmill" Naczas, Ray "The Boss" Nickerson, and Pat “Get in the box” Pirone all suffer from a lack of brain signals going to their feet as well.
Dollar Family Discount
George Hodgdon is home recovering and Jon Picard called out sick with the flu.., so it was a mad dash to get qualified referees for last Saturday's games.
Originally we were supposed to have the Dynamic Duo of Billy Abcunas and Mike Naczas.., but (as always) the League Director shirked his responsibility and outsourced his job to a 3rd party.
Not wanting to hire outside professionals at premium referee rates.., the League Director wanted to keep it in the family and hire his brother-in-law Rick Alwyin.
For those of you who don't know Rick.., before retiring from the Over-30, Rick used to be a speedy tenacious player who currently ranks #120 on the All-Time Career Leaders.., so it was nice to see Rick back in amongst his former teammates who enjoy busting his balls.., just like every other ref in the league.
However; we didn't notice if John "The Kissing Bandit" Coluciello grabbed a pre-game hug from Kellie.., or if he thought better of it since her big brother was there and refereeing.
Oprah Night
"You're getting a new jacket.., and you're getting a new jacket.., everyone is getting a new jacket"
Whoa... (Easy Oprah).., only the players from Trojan Horse are getting new jackets.
Last Saturday night was "Championship Jacket Night" and the event was sponsored by Jim Barber and the Number 9
Congratulations to Trojan Horse as those jackets are one of the nicest ones made in recent years.., even Captain Jim said he might actually wear this one for a few weeks before retiring it to the closet with the other 8.
#2018ChampionshipFleece?
This could be your last chance to win an "Over-30 Jacket" as there is still a grass-roots organization that has been petitioning the league to end the "everyone gets a plastic jacket" and replacing it with a more fashionable and contemporary Championship Fleece.
FYI.., it's the same grass-roots organization that successfully lobbied for (and finally was incorporated) by awarding new championship tee-shirts. So get behind the movement at #NewRegime #FreshIdeas #ChangeForTheBetter
Ceremonial Ass-Kicking
Always blunt and never subtle Carlos Machado had enough seeing 12-new Championship Jackets come out of the box.., and said "Alright-alright.., let's get on with the game.., and ruin their celebration"
Though it's not our "Quote of the week".., as that dumbass quote comes from another player below.
However, just like the Grinch that tried to steal Christmas.., Carlos' evil plan to steal thier celebration didn't come to flourish as Trojan Horse threw a ceremonial 4-0 beating on Team Cherry as the horses galloped into sole possession of 1st place.
Awards Hat Trick
Scotty Rosato registered the first ever “Awards Hat Trick” by tripling up on the awards from last week.., Scotty was awarded his teams "Trojan of the Week Award" and he also received the "Dunkin Donuts Player of the Week Award" after last week’s stellar shutout performance.
Before those two prestigious awards.., Scotty received the most desired award that only 12-players get (per season) and that was his new “Championship Jacket”
Scotty… is there any chance we can get a picture of you wearing your new “Championship Jacket” and the “Spartan Helmet” while sipping a “Dunkin Donuts” coffee? History needs to be documented.
February’s Hot-Hands
Can you believe the hottest player of the month has gone unrecognized by the liberal awards committee?
Umberto Biancardi scored in every game for his team for the month of February.
Highlighted by 2-goals (10-seconds apart) which is crazy because it typically takes Umberto almost 30-seconds to cover half the dek.., but needless to say "Papa Smurf" for the month of February delivered 4-goals and 1-assist and earned his spot in the scoring challenge raffle.
Mike Caso’s Song
Mike Caso’s back and you're gonna be in trouble
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
You see him comin' better cut out on the double
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
You been spreading lies that he was untrue
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
So look out now cause he's comin' after you
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
(Hey, he knows that you been tryin')
(And he knows that you been lyin')
He's been gone for such a long time
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
Now he's back and things'll be fine
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
You're gonna be sorry you were ever born
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
Cause he's kinda big and he's awful strong
(Hey-la-day-la Mike Caso’s back)
Welcome back Mike Caso… your “temp-to-perm” requisition paperwork has been completed as Maybe One has claimed you off the waiver wire.
We have a new policy regarding Matty Iannello… if you feel Matty is being “a prick”, we now have a grievance committee dedicated to reviewing these types of complaints.
Quote of the Week
Apparently John "Let's go get in the faceoff circle already" Coluciello was trying to institute a new rule last week.
John was very adamant that the referees had to... (get this).., and I quote.., "You have to wait TWO Mississippi's before blowing the whistle".
Apparently John has been playing in a league where they count “Two Mississippi's” once the ball goes onto the back of the goal netting. The Over-30 rule is (and has been) that it's an automatic whistle.
Hey Cooch.., do us all a favor if you wanna count Mississippi's.., trying getting in the faceoff circle before "Two Mississippi's"
The Real Untold Story
Once publicly ridiculed for defacing and cutting his sleeves off his jersey.., that lead to a league wide mandate about defacing the league's jersey.., Sergio Costa wanted to set the story straight last week and come clean about "Sleevegate".
Apparently it was not Sergio that cut the sleeves off his jersey after all. Serg said that Mrs Costa who was actually the culprit.., but she was acting on his behalf.
When asked “Why did she cut them so high up the shoulder?”.., he said that his wife thought she was doing a good thing by matching all the other wife-beater shirts he's been wearing since playing with Fools Gold.
Hey Sergio, you're Portuguese not Italian.., leave the wife-beaters for the experts.
Everyone knows when you sport a wife-beater you need to wear a lot of cologne, have a minimum of 2-gold chains (of which one has to be a rope chain).., and they have to have a "Cross" and/or a "Saint Medallion" on them.., all while you recite quotes from either Goodfellas or The Godfather.
Internal Affairs Investigation Unit
After seeing both Goalies win the "Players of the Week Awards" for their shutout perfomances.. and still stewing over being snubbed in Week #3.., Maybe One Goaltender Jeff Deharo has filed a grievance with the Over-30 Internal Affairs Investigation Unit.
Jeff is filing a formal complaint sighting “Racial Goalie Profiling” along with “Opposing Opponent Discrimination."
Jeff has petitioned the IAIU with the following summary showing that “ALL” other goalies have been rewarded for their shutouts except for one;
|
Goalie
|
Shutout
|
Score
|
Award
|
|
Dave Guisti
|
Fools Gold
|
(4-0)
|
Dunkin Donuts
|
|
Jeff Deharo
|
Fools Gold
|
(5-0)
|
Nothing
|
|
Scott Rosato
|
Team Cherry
|
(4-0)
|
Dunkin Donuts
|
|
Sean Roach
|
Maybe One
|
(2-0)
|
Five Guys
|
Jeff’s complaint to the IAIU includes how he was overshadowed by someone that "Hustled" .., (AND!) let the record show that his "Hustle" resulted in “Zero Goals” and “Zero Assists”.., while Jeff’s shutout resulted in a "Win"… but “Zero Awards”
PTSD
Apparently Jason Carrien is suffering from Post-Traumatic-Stress-Syndrome as he took the time this week to send a photo of himself and what he sees every morning when he wakes up and gets ready for work.
|
