Over 30 Hockey League

Article 461 - January 22, 2022

Game Results and Player(s) of the Week

Breaking News

Apparently Top Secret’s “Elephant Cage” isn’t big enough to hold two “Elephants”.

Doug Sedille has sighted personal reasons for bowing out of the 30th Anniversary Spring Season.

There will be no replacement as the other “Elephant”, Joe Shannon was the “extra-extra” guy.., and now he will become just the “extra” guy.

Doug did not mention their double overtime loss in the finals and his missed opportunities as part of the reason why he’s stepping down for the second half of this season.

The League Director was overheard telling the Board of Directos that we are not returning Doug’s #16 back up into the rafters… as he hopes Doug will reappear in the 2022 Over-30 draft later this fall.

ReUnited 2-0

“ReUnited and it feels so good..,” as they have come out of the gate swinging with a fresh 2-0 start.

We wanted to know the secret so we ask ReUnited Captain Jim Barber about the turnaround..,he simply said “Mom Iacoviello”

Apparently Steve Iacoviello’s Mom saw that her baby “Ike” had 0-points last season and wanted to see if her son wasn’t as good as he was saying he is.., or if the team stinks.

After her week one appearance to critique her sons playing… Steve goes out and shattered last seasons goose egg with 2-assists making him the first Spring Challenge entry.

Then last week with Mom in the crowd (again).., little “Ike” triples his point production from last season and rips his first goal of the season and won himself a free cheseburger from Five Guys.

So that means with Rob Valley, Mike Delory and Derrick Power out of the lineup and “Mom Iacoviello” in the stands…they are 2-0.  Let’s see if the magic can continue this week.

Whiffed

Poor Joe Shannon.., he’s trying to regain his former title of most goals scored All-Time.., but if he keeps missing opportunities like he did last week, he’ll never catch “The Great One” Matty Iannello

Joe had a golden opportunity last week as ReUnited goaltender Scotty Rosato was down and out… and the ball just sitting there ripe for the picking.., you could see it in Joe’s eyes and expression.

Fee-fi-fo-Brum

What does Tuukka Rask and Jake Brum have in common besides goaltenders being out on IR?  They both mad the respective return to their teams last week.

It was good to see former “Best Goalie” Jake Brum filling the pipes for Last Call.., but after being down 4-0 you could see Assistant Captain Dave Costa on his cell phone calling Dan Broderick for advice on digging out of a hole and to ask if he still has Sandra Glista’s number?

We asked Jake if maybe Sandra had taken in the seams causing Jake to be constricted.., but he said no it just smelled like combination of Febreze and Canel N°5.

Tale of Two Halves

Defending Champions Omerta were in the midst of laying an ass-whopping on Last Call before Dave Costa said enough was enough after being down 4-goals for the first period and a half of play.

The second half of period two… Dave Costa sparked a 7-goal unanswered beat down on Omerta that reminded us up the Mike Tyson vs Peter McNeeley beat down,

Sure… Peter came out swinging… but was quickly KO’d… and that’s pretty much how the Omerta vs Last Call matchup played out.

Our only question is:  Loosing 7-4.., How does Omerta come out with the top 2 stars and Dave Costa gets the #3 star???.., did the voters feel like they had to throw the leading defenseman a bone or give him some sympathy votes?  

Dave you got robbed of the #1 Star along with other Last Call players who aided in the 7-goal turnaround to victory.

100% Scoring

Both Nick Doherty and George Medeiros figured in 100% of their teams scoring with both of them scoring a hattrick and adding an assist.  However Nick bested Geroge for the Dunkin Donuts Player of the week with his 4-goals performance (including a natural hat trick).

Team Mongrel’s Mascot is off to good start.., we’ll tally the IOC points after all the players get some games on the scoring sheets.

You might be..,

Jeff Foxworthy and his “You might be a Redneck” routine has been updated to “You might be in trouble when” and applied to the Over-30 League.

“You might be in trouble when”.., Ron “The Flying Hawaiian Aquino scores the game tying goal against your team just 3-feet after stepping over the half dek line.

“You might be in trouble when”.., Gino Tammaro comes speeding over the line ripping an off-wing top shelf goals.

“You might be in trouble when”.., Your goaltender is out for an extended IR stint.

“You might be in trouble when”.., Your leading scorer is on the same IR report as your goalie.

“You might be in trouble when”.., You start having a team civil war.

First Suspension

Week #2 brings the first suspension of the league.  Without discussing the player, or the reasons behind the suspension.., the League’s Director (and the Board of Directors) want players to know that a players safety is of the utmost importance while playing in this league.

You are reminded about the league’s official “ZERO Tolerance Policy” and about keeping your emotions and actions in check at all times. 

This has always been an “Invitational” league and not a standard Hockeytown league.., and it’s run it accordingly. 

So always remember; Make the commitment, Pay your dues, Have fun it’s a sport, Respect the League and the Officials and most importantly your fellow players (as you might end up playing on a team with them in the future).