Over 30 Hockey League

Jokers Wild

November’s new Jokers Wild game is underway… 25% sold in the first week alone.  See Tony Medeiros or Mike Naczas this week…, as the leagues #1 salesman Jason Carrien will be unavailable to close deals.

Tips for picking winning cards… Find the cards that Lee Nogler signed and buy up all the real estate around him.

Let us know if our tip worked.

HOT HOT HOT!!!

There is no bigger storyline this week than the (last place) M*A*S*H and their monumental upset over the (first place) Dominions 2-1. 

They started the season in a freefall losing streak with a 0-7 record in the standings (reminiscent of Captain’s Mutiny) and we all know how that fairytale story ended.

It wasn’t until the doubleheader weekend (Week #8) when M*A*S*H had their first win 2-1 to beat Barney & Friends and almost had a weekend sweep if they didn’t collapse in the 3^rd to Azores Express on Sunday losing 6-5.

With two wins in the last 3-games, as they beat the 3^rd place Barney & Friends 2-1 and the undefeated (but not perfect) 1^st place Dominions…, M*A*S*H is officially a HOT team…, so let’s give them their 15-minutes of fame (or in this case 4-minutes and 20-seconds) and celebrate with Timmy “Buster Poindexter” Burke;

Underdogs

Last Saturday (Week #10) was the week for the underdogs. 

Despite a clock malfunction with a questionable goal.  Hammertime (5^th) bested Azores Express (4^th) to swap place in the standings, after a Hammertime 4-3 win.

Then M*A*S*H (6^th) shocked the spectators with their 2-1 win of the Dominions (1^st).  No one saw that loss coming for Dominic DeFrancisco and his team of minions…, well except for Eric Fortin, maybe he saw it coming (before) he quit.

Barney & Friends (3^rd) rounded out the weekend of upset(s) by knocking off Phoenix Rising (2^nd) with a convincing 4-2 win…, which was led by Mike Duggan, who factored into every goal.

So just when you find yourself in a potentially un-winnable game… just remember, “Have no fear… Underdog is here”

Milestones

Milestones are used to measure one’s individual success… and maybe bragging rights too.  But it’s a different story when your milestones become a league record, and from now on…, every point, goal and assist Matty Iannello scores is a new league record.

Last week The Over-30 League had to create a new points club with just (1) member as Matty “The Great One” Iannello joined the very exclusive 1400-points club.

Congratulations to “Matty I” on his 1400^th point with the breakdown being 559-goals & 841-assists (both league records)…, and don’t forget 1-open heart surgery to make it 1401 (also another league record) as we can’t recall another player who returned to action after open heart surgery.

There are also (9) additional players to have a career milestone this season… you can see them all by clicking the link below:

2024 Winter Milestones

“Clock!!!”

Up 3-1 and cruising to the finish line for the win…, we started to hear cries from rink “Clock!!”…, “Clock!!” (as play continued) despite multiple Hammertime players calling for a stoppage in play (including the Head Statistician).

Play continued for a minimum of 60-90 seconds , all the while hearing the cries of “CLOCK!!” … With both Referees assigned from the “Helen & Keller Temp Agency”…, both officials failed to blow the whistle for the clock malfunction resulting in an controversial Azores Express goal from Steve Medeiros.

The Hockeytown clocks are becoming a notorious pain in the ass for the timekeepers.  With either faulty wiring or the clock itself, timekeeping is becoming a nuisance for the league…, and the front office has sent formal complaints to Hockeytown.

Official Ruling:  Per the Over-30 League Director, once a clock error occurs, play should be stopped immediately to address the malfunction.  The timekeeper and/or referees shall call for an immediate stoppage of play by sounding the buzzer (if applicable) or alerting the Referees to blow the whistle.

Once the clock and time are corrected, the resulting faceoff shall be at the center faceoff dot.  The leagues officials will do their best to estimate runoff, and (as always) players without a “C” or an “A” are advised to not interfere with the process and argue with the officials.

Rebuttal

After scoring a controversial goal (with Hammertime bitching)…, Azores Express captain Dave Costa looked over at the bench and flipped off fellow captain Jim Barber.

Then less than 2-minutes later Azores Express Pedro Fontes scored their 3^rd consecutive goal to make it 3-3 with 1:12 left to play…, and once again Dave flipped off his fellow captain.

But, revenge is a dish best served cold…, and Patrick Spencer “bookended” the game’s scoring sheet by scoring the first goal (and the last goal) of the game…, with the GWG coming just 22-seconds after Dave flipped off his captain for the second time.

After the 4-3 win, we reached out to the Hammertime captain for a rebuttal and comment on Dave’s antics after scoring two goals and flipping him off;

Stranger Danger

Sorry Anthony Petrillo, we know you’re just a fill-in at this point until something permanent opens up…, but our apologies are in reference to you being the butt-end of a joke regarding your Captain Jim Barber.

Someone thought it would be cute to give you a gray #10 jersey with a “C” on it.  But it backfired as you played down to the level of the “real #10”.  Your game was jinxed by that gray wetsuit you were given.

Also, shame on you…, your mother should have taught you to never take candy (or a random hockey jersey) from a stranger. 

We also want to warn you that there is no candy in the white van circling the parking lot..., and we don’t recommend you help a stranger look for his lost puppy in the woods outback.

Take our advice, go back to your original jersey #62 and help Hammertime in the standings race by scoring a couple of goals this week.

Road to 3rd?

We heard it through the grapevine following Azores Express 4-3 loss to Hammertime that Gino Tammaro had a masterplan and a roadmap to finish this season in 3^rd place. 

We didn’t really follow along, but heard Gino was on his soapbox telling a fellow teammate that M*A*S*H was their best matchup for the playoffs…, but that was before M*A*S*H shocked the onlookers of the 5:30 game.

We asked Brian Capodilupo to clarify Gino’s “road to 3^rd place theory” and he said “We just need to focus on … the road to the next win…, or maybe the road to the second line scoring”.

New Nickname

There’s a new nickname being floated in the Over-30 League and will give you a hint to see if you can guess the player.

This player had a “perfect season” and yet never played in any of the 17-games.

But this season, Todd Bryson aka “Todd-zilla” is doing his part as the #2 goal scorer for M*A*S*H with 3-goals including the GWG last week that gave the Dominions their first loss of the season.

For the record, Todd was on the IR for the entire season when the Roadrunners went 17-0.  We asked “Todd-zilla” why he never came back to play in that perfect season and he said…, “I was ready to come back after Week #4, but unlike my fellow Roadrunner and current teammate Mike Naczas, I know how to respect a winning streak…, and they just kept winning without me… so I kept sitting to perfection”

Todd will go down in league history as the only perfect 17-0 benchwarmer.

“Dumbass”

File this one under “Dumbass”…, Did anyone else notice Pat Pirone persistently digging at the pads of goaltender Dave Giusti? 

Down 2-1 with just seconds to play, Pat was seen hacking and whacking away at what he thought was a loose ball in Dave’s pads.  We all know Pat’s motto, “Play and dig until the whistle”

Ok fine, most will agree with that motto (less the hacking and whacking)…, but the funny part is, Pat was digging at a phantom loose ball in the crease…, as the real ball was 12-feet away in the corner…, and subsequently Pat was sent to the penalty box for slashing.

Once again, the league leader in “Offensive Zone Penalties” gets an offensive zone penalty with just 14-seconds left to play.  Which is still plenty of time to win a draw and score a goal.

Cadence (NSFW)

It looks like we finally figured out how M*A*S*H has turned it around and are slowly becoming a unified cohesive team.

We have leaked video footage of captain Jamie Kehoe running his team through a pre-game vulgar cadence around Hockeytown

Best Game

Dave Giusti is your typical “Hot or Cold” goalie… When he’s “Hot” he looks like Dominik Hasek flopping around making incredible saves… and when he’s “Cold” it’s like watching him try and make saves while soaking in a post-game ice bath.

Last week Dave was on fire saving his best game of the season for the #1 undefeated champs… and how good of a job did Dave do?

Good enough that both captains were fired up with emotions and ready to throwdown during the weening seconds of the game…, until they both realized the fisticuffs was right in front of the owner’s box, and that they both like each other, and the game was over…, so lets have an adult beverage and celebrate a perfectly executed win and a narrow loss.

Wedding Gift

Looks like the new soon to be “Mrs. Duggan” didn’t suspend Mike Duggan for 2-games after all.  Rachel let Mike play one last game before tying the knot under one condition.

Yep, you guessed it!  Mike had to strap on a 5-gallon bucket with a birdcage… and that was good news for Barney & Friends and even better news for Mike, as Phoenix Rising fill-in goaltender Steve “Mr. Perfect” Taddonio gave “Doo-gan” a nice 2-goal, 2-assist wedding present, a week early.

Goalie Rehab

With Steve Taddonio filling in for AJ Larabee…, we were left wondering what happened to AJ?  He hasn’t missed a game all season…, but then we figured it out.

AJ had to spend a weekend in “Goalie Rehab” after giving up 13-goals over the doubleheader weekend…, he didn’t look so good after the 8-goal lambasting by their first place rivals…. We have footage from his inpatient check-in:

Real Over-50 Master

After reading about Tony Medeiros, Paul Firicano and Dave Wilson winning the Over-50 tournament a few weeks ago…, now Tommy Gallagher wants to set the record straight.

Last week Tommy flagged down a field reporter to drop a dime on their win…, seems that (yes) those three players did win the Over-50 tournament (but) in the “B” division.

Seems they won the “B” division because our own “Tommy Boy” was also there…, and busy winning the “A” division.

Congrats on being an “A” player winning in an “A” division tournament… and helping provide some undocumented “A”ssistance to the M*A*S*H captains and helping turn that ship around with some unlettered leadership.

Tis’ the Season

Well with Halloween and October behind us…, it’s time to jump into the next holiday, Christmas in November. 

Yep, for whatever reason, New Englanders are obsessed with Christmas so much that they forget that Thanksgiving is the next holiday on the calendar…. And that goes for the ALD Mike Naczas.

After trying to hang his Christmas lights unsuccessfully last season…

This Thanksgiving Season, the ALD Mike Naczas used league funds to expense the hanging of his Christmas lights.  

Yes, that’s an Over-30 Hall of Fame Legend Joe Shannon high up on the ladder doing Naz’ bidding.

Poopsie

We have late breaking news that came into the Over-30 News Desk right before the publishing deadline.

Our own Mike Duggan is set to marry his fiancée Rachel on Saturday…, and in doing so, Mike is taking all the top talent (except Tito) from the league play this week.

But that’s not the story…, Turns out “Mama Duggan” calls her angel of a son “Poopsie”

Don’t believe us… Here’s a photo of “Mama Doo-gan’s” phone when she wants to call her son Mike (Opps, Sorry I mean Poopsie).

Don’t worry Mike, it’s the Over-30 League and everyone here is a mature adult (Over the age of 30) except for our youngest Dave Norton…, but I’m sure no one in the league will call you “Poopsie”…, but if I know Jason “Judas” Carrien, he’s already switched your name in his phone.   “~Seri, Call Poopsie”

So, from the Over-30 League we want to extend our congratulations from the league and your fellow players as we say… ~Good Luck in your new lives together as Mr. & Mrs. Duggan - 11/10/2024